How To Handle The Guilt

Friends, our Chucky is breathing hard.  He's on all the blood-thinners, blood pressure reducing, diuretics, and anti-anxiety meds that the veterinarian prescribed, but his heart is slowly failing.

The Hubby and I were once in agreement that we should NOT seek additional vet visits, in the interest of lessening Chucky's stress.  This decision does NOT lessen our stress, or my guilt at having planned (and paid for!) an upcoming long weekend in the Upper Peninsula with friends.

How can I leave my boy when these may be some of his last days?  Or, am I in serious freak-out mode, and needlessly picking at the need to get him to the vet to see if there is more, more, MORE we can do?

Chucky, as I left for the office

I could email the vet's office, and see if she can recommend anything without seeing Chuck.  When we last visited, she wanted to schedule a new echocardiogram.  Within a month of that appointment, Chuck went downhill for a couple of days, and I cancelled in the belief that another vet visit would surely be too stressful.  Then, when The Hubby upped one diuretic pill by a little bit, Chuck turned around and was energetic and herding woolies.

Guess I'm just venting here; there is no completely right or wrong answers.  In a way, my departure for a few days reduces stress, because I'm a huge sack of worry and pain!  Perhaps this short trip will give me the fortitude to relax, and focus on filling Chuck's days with love and peace, not my jagged energy of regret.

P.S. Once I hit 'publish' on this post, I immediately emailed the veterinarian's office for advice.  Guess it couldn't hurt, right?  And trust me, The Hubby is A-OK with me going away; he encourages me to enjoy the things that I love, plus he doesn't travel.  Won't travel, is more like it.  I work a full-time job, while he's retired.  I've earned some down time, and yet...

Thanks for reading.  My cat friends in the blogosphere seem to speak to my heart when we all share the stories of our lives with cats.